From the Armory: Snapfire and N-Strike Elite Rumors

This week, Kernel Sanders examines the Nerf Snapfire and speculates on the N-Strike Elite.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLL RIIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHTTTTT!!!!

Its been awhile since we’ve heard from the armory, but now that the year has turned over and had a few months to run, we’ve got some fun stuff to look forward to. The first of which comes from Nerf’s somewhat beleaguered Dart Tag range. Nerf made one of the greatest guns ever when they built the Dart Tag Fury Fire, because it was simple, modable, and had a high magazine capacity. The generation after this one contained the bomb known as the Quick 16, a massively over complicated slam fire blaster designed with an integrated magazine for sixteen Taggers.  This gun was marred by very weak construction and weak performance, oh, and did I mention that it jammed whenever another player sneezed? The point is, the Dart Tag line took a nose dive, but now Nerf may give the line some life with the Snapfire.

Of the guns that came before it, this one takes most after the old Barricade, the gun that introduced this generation to flywheel construction in Nerf blasters. Both are true semi-automatic blasters, where one pull of the trigger will fire one of the darts. Now, to make this possible in the Barricade, the trigger operated an arm which pushed the darts into the spinning flywheels which launched the darts. This gun seems to make use of a standard plunger system and an eight round turret, all of which is operated from the trigger!

That’s right, pulling the trigger in this gun both advances the turret, primes the plunger, and fires the gun. ZOH MY GODS! No motors, no batteries, no pumping, just a pure semi-automatic pistols, the dream of a dual wielder……….or is it? Ya see, other guns which has trigger operated turrets include gems like the Maverick. Though Nerf has improved these trigger operated turret systems, they are still plagued by weak components which causes misfires and jams. And indeed, with the brief video I found of its firing, it did appear to jam. It was, however, a low quality vid, and the gun itself could be a pre-production model, so we’ll see to reliability when it hits stores. Also something new on this model, adjustable spring tension. There is a switch on this gun which can ease spring tension, reducing range and increasing rate of fire, or increase it for the inverse affects. That is actually a really smart idea, it gives the player options which can make the difference between life and death in game. I will, however be curious to break into one and see how they are accomplishing it. In any event, I expect this to be highly effective close range sidearm, I can’t expect this thing to have great range out of the box. Assuming the reliability is up to par, or can be modded to be, this could truly be one of the greatest running blasters Nerf has made.

So what else is new? Well, watch this.

That’s right Nerfers, Hasbro has finally let Nerf make their awesome looking guns perform as well as they should, or so they claim. Really, it is to wonder how they’re going to accomplish this. Well not that much of a wonder. As a Nerf Modder myself, I spend my nights and weekends making blasters shoot farther, or faster, or both. But in the process I often as not make them more dangerous. Either making them sting a bit when they hit, or cause bruises and welts on unprotected skin. With Hasbro and Nerf being so conscious about law suits, just like everyone else in the business, it would make no sense to create guns which would cause more damage than their current line. But then it goes back to that preview, and the claim that it makes, 75ft ranges. Now really, when one is measuring a range like that, they’re measuring the range from the muzzle of the blaster to where it lands, so really the effective range is between 5 and 10 ft less, though that is probably going to be rather low. So I would count on reliable ranges out to 60-65 ft. In any event, those guns have to be more powerful, unless Nerf has modified the ammo somehow.

Oh, I forgot to mention the ammo. I want to buy the gun just for the ammo, on the surface they seem to have repainted the standard streamlines with a blue shaft, WHICH LOOKS AWESOME! Though Nerf mentions this special ammo, so maybe they’ve FINALLY rebalanced the weight in the streamline to correct the fishtailing issues which have plagued them since their birth.

How they plan to accomplish this miracle is all speculation at this point, as Nerf is being tight lipped until the release date later this year, but I’m going to keep watching the New Zealand and Australian sites for more updates and bring them to you as I find them. But here’s the bottom line, Nerf seems to be finally listening to its adult fan base, which is not insignificant, and making blasters which can do the job they need them to do. So in summary: The Snapfire the N-Strike Elite ranges are new more tactically oriented Nerf blasters with greater rand and usability in mind. These blasters appear, from preliminary data, to be highly effective as tactical weapons in Nerf Wars. We’ll see what actually stack up, but the Snapfire gets a preliminary rating of 4 out of 5 for its full semi-automatic firing and lack of a loud motor, and the N-Strike Elite range as a whole receives 4 out of 5 darts for offering a variety of tactical options with ranges equivalent to modified blasters.

From the Armory: Nerf Vortex Line Mods

In my last article I mentioned that the Nerf Nitron is a bit of a pointless gun out of the box. But I feel that it has mod potential. The beautiful thing about electrically powered weapons is that the easiest way to improve it is to up the voltage. For a gun like the Stampede, simply upping the voltage from 9v to 12v takes its rate of fire, with a stock spring, from 180 rounds per minute to a blistering 300 rounds per minute, almost double! The same principle can apply to the Nitron. Upping the voltage on the fly wheels will increase the already impressive range, and doing the same to the motor that feeds the disks will increase the rate of fire. Suddenly the gun becomes sounds a little more useful doesn’t it?

The Nitron, Vigilon, and Praxis are all powered by the same system: a long arm propelled by a torsion spring which simply whacks the disk in the back, pushing it out of the breach. The simplest way to modify the power system for greater range is to relocate spring hard point, which puts the spring under greater tension. Here’s a convenient photo to illustrate that.

Note the screw which holds the bottom portion of the spring in place. By moving that screw over to the hole that the arrow is pointing to and hooking the spring around it, you put more tension on the spring, so that when its pulled around, there is greater potential energy, and therefore more power when you fire it.

Now be warned, when up the tension on these springs, which are already pretty dern stiff, you have to reinforce the catch spring which holds the throwing arm back or the thing won’t catch, and the gun will fire as soon as you take your hand off the cocking mechanism. I did this mod on my Proton, which I bought as a plaything, and I’m STILL trying to balance the catch spring properly. When I have managed to get the thing to catch though, the performance is BRILLIANT. It goes up from around 40-50 ft. flat, to around 60, and that in a pump action weapon like the Praxis is just brilliant.

More detailed write ups to come.

From the Armory: Arsenal Building Guide

AAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLL RIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!

So, we’ve had a few chats about new guns and quite a bit of information was imparted about the various advantages and disadvantages of various weapons. But some of you are probably wondering, “What does it all mean?” “How does this apply to me?” Well here’s a little guide to choosing the right weapons for you.

Part 1: How do you fight?

One of my fencing coaches always was telling me to fight my fight, nobody else’s, and the same applies to Nerf. I tend to think about Nerfing in terms of “commando stereotypes.”
They are:
Sniper
Scout
Anti-Personnel and Suppressive Fire
Commander/General

Your sniper trains up on long range weapons, modified Long Strikes, Long Shots, Blowguns, and Nite Finders. They’re roll is to provide precision fire at long range. Since they make more precise shots, they can get away with carrying less ammo than most others, often only expending about 30 rounds in a typical game (15 minutes).

The scout focuses on maneuverability and lightness, rolling with pistols and light carbines like Nite Finders and Fury Fires. Their job is to move quickly and scout out an area, and engage the position until the rest of the squad can show, or sneak up and take out enemies with stealth tactics. A scout needs to carry quite a bit of ammo, probably around 60 rounds.

The anti-personnel and suppressive fire guy rolls with the rapid-fire weapons and shot guns. Their job, kills as many people as possibly in the least amount of time. They’re going to want to roll with Stampedes, Rapid-Fire 20’s, and Buzzbee Berzerkers. Their job is to roll into to battle and mow down folks, break rushes, and provide covering fire for a tactical retreat. You’ve got to go heavy on the ammo if you fight in this class, probably over 100 rounds.

The commander/general is a bit of a jack of all trades. He generally caries multiple guns which fill multiple roles. Blowguns are a good weapon for the commander, because they are light and provide good range. Slam fire guns like the Raider and Alpha-Trooper with multiple clips are also good for the commander to keep around. You’re probably going to want about 70 rounds.

Now the purpose of these guys are archetypes, almost nobody actually outfits themselves to fit only one of these roles, or fills these roles all the time. Usually one picks two depending upon their strengths. The key to being a good sniper is patience and accuracy. If you like to take aim and bean a quarter at 40 feet, sniper is the appropriate role for you to fill. Scouts have to be able to move, dodging is key to this roll, so if you can jump around all night, scouting is a good option. Anti-personnel folks need to be able to move as well, though less so than the scout, but if you like spraying fire all over the place while shouting like Schwarzenager, this is your role.

Part 2: The Guns

Sniping Weapons

When you’re sniping, you want the double whammy of range and accuracy. When modding a Nerf gun, increased range and accuracy generally go hand in hand. Your barrel material is CPVC. This gives a tight seal against the dart, though you have to twist the dart into the barrel. This decreases your rate of fire. But for a sniper, this is almost a good thing, because it trains you to time your shots, to line them up, and to make each round count.

Nite-Finders modified with the spring out of a Tek Six and a CPVC barrel is called a sniper pistol. This has increased range and, assuming the barrel is aligned properly, incredibly accurate. In my games, shots on the gun count as a kill, and a Nite Finger used properly can almost send darts up the barrel of the your opponents weapon. If you are of a Vortex disposition, the Proton is a good alternative, though it is less accurate, it has good range out of the box, and con be modified for greater range.

Blow guns are made from ½ in. PVC piping cut to length. Each gun is customized to the individual player by placing the pipe in the mouth, extending the arm out and cutting the pipe off about six inches in front of the finger tips. A dart is loaded into the back, and then a swift puff of air sends the dart out to distances up to 70 ft flat very straight. For a weapon that is this light, it’s very light, and easy to carry.

But the ultimate sniper’s play toy combines a blowgun with some kind of air tank to create a small air canon. These can be easily sourced from the Buzzbee Berzerker or Ultimate Missile Blast. Cutting off the existing barrel and attaching a blowgun barrel of about 6-8 in. long renders a breach loading weapon which can reach out to 80, 90, and even 100 ft. Add a longer barrel and you can break 100 ft., though once you get past about two feet of barrel, the aerodynamic restrictions of the darts themselves prevents much greater range, and once you get up to 80 or so feet, most darts will begin to weave in the air and loose accuracy. This weapon also has a slow rate of fire, as the barrel must be removed and a dart loaded, then the air tank must be pumped between five and eight times to full pressure, and then its ready to aim and fire. But its worth is because no other Nerf gun has this one’s muzzle velocity and range. To get much better you’d have to use either a custom high pressure air tank or a CO2 canister, both of which would shred stock darts, so you’d have to build your own. Since these are illegal in my games, this is essentially the ultimate sniping weapon.

Scouting Weapons

When you’re rolling as a Scout, lightness is everything. Basically you’ve got to be ready for a 100 yard dash at a moment’s notice, so you can’t be weighed down by large guns and a load of magazines. So light weapons are the Scout’s best friend.

A Nite-Finder is a great choice for the scout. Modified with a Tek Six spring and a Roseart barrel renders a gun which reloads quickly, while still having good range an accuracy. Rolling with two of these gives the Scout plenty of firepower, while still remaining light. The Proton is the Vortex equivalent.

Blowguns are a nice light weapon, but the long one’s suitable for snipers are a bit bulky to carry around. But the lovely thing about CPVC pipe is they can be cut. A two foot blow gun will still deliver good range and accuracy, while being compact enough to not impede easy movement.

The Maverick.

BOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

No no, now hold on! A stock Maverick is essentially a jam waiting to happen, but with a little TLC it can work. It has several advantages as a weapon system. Its light for one thing, and compact, about as deep as a stock Nite-Finder, and only a few inches longer, so its very compact and maneuverable. It uses a six shot revolving turret, and an inverse plunger system, cocked by a back slide. Stock the ranges are somewhat poor generally, many have trouble making it to 20 ft, and the components are so weak, that often as not the weapon either misfires or jams. But given a few mods and tweaks, the range is upped to around 30-40 ft and reliability becomes much improved. If you would prefer to use discs, the Vigilon is a good substitute. It uses a six internal magazine, and the same back slide cocking system as the Maverick, with the great range of the Vortex line. It is, however somewhat bulkier than the Maverick, though it is better built, and still small enough to not impede mobility overly much.

If you want something with a little bit higher rate of fire, the Fury Fire is the way to go for scouts. It’s a good compromise between the larger rifles and pistols, about a foot and a half in length, it is a pump action weapon with a ten round turret. Out of the box it delivers a decent 20 ft. range, and can be modified for ranges up to about 35 ft. The ten round, pump action system gives a great rate and volume of fire for such a small package. If you need to lay down fire until your buddies arrive? This is the gun to do it. If you are of a Vortex disposition, the Praxis is a great choice for this, same mag size, same pump action layout, with ranges reaching out to 50-60 ft. The ten shot clips and small and light, and give a good rapid reload. It’s a bit bulkier than the Fury Fire, but still compact enough to not impede maneuverability.

Anti-Personnel/Suppressive Fire Weapons

Rate of fire is key for this type of fighting, so fully automatic weapons are Johnny on the spot.

The most popular full auto these days by far is the Stampede, and that’s because it works. Out of the box it fires out to about 25-30 ft. and has a rate of fire about 180 rounds per minute, from 18 round clips, with the ability to take the 6 round clip, and 18 and 36 round drums. It has a high rate of fire, a rapid reload, and good name, so what if its not the most accurate gun in the world? It doesn’t use a fly wheel, and it feels good to shoot. Its an excellent weapon for suppression and aggression. If its Vortex you want, you want the fully automatic Nitron.

The Rapid-Fire 20 is the old man on the block, still sold at Target, but for how long? I couldn’t tell you, so if you want one, get one now! This gun takes a bit of TLC to get it to shoot. Each of the twenty rounds must be loaded into the turret, then it must be pumped about forty times. But once its ready for fire, you get 300 rounds per minute, almost twice that of the stampede, and a range of about 30 ft, so about the same as that of the Stampede. It’s a bit slower to reload, but that rate of fire can’t be matched, nor can the psychological factor of all of those round blasting at you.

The Raider and Alpha-Trooper are both cut from the same cloth. They make use of essentially the same internals at the Long Strike, but have a system called Slamfire. This is a rapid fire system where one can hold down the trigger and pull the cocking handle back and forth quickly to cause the weapon to shoot rapidly, one shot for each cycling of the cocking mechanism for a rate of fire about 240 rounds per minute. Stock ranges are poor, between 15 and 20 ft, but this can be improved by knocking the air restrictor out and putting a second spring in the detachable stock (after cutting the back of the gun out), this gets it up to about 35-40 ft, possibly further if you are using completely fresh darts. They have the ability to take the 6 and 18 round clips, as well as the 18 and 36 round drums, so there is no shortage of large magazines. One disadvantage is that as the cocking mechanism is on the front of both of these weapons, cycling it quickly back and forth causes the nose to judder about, throwing off the aim, so its not the most accurate weapon in the world.

I’m an example of a Commander/General type of fighter, I specialize in scout weapons but I carry several of them, so weight class I’m in with the heavies. I also carry two sniping weapons, and a Rapid 20, so I’ve got a gun that fits most every situation, which uses the same ammo type, of which I have a lot, around 200 rounds.

Part 3: The Gear

Now that you have your guns you have to figure out how to carry them and all the ammo you have for them. Many folks often as not carry in their hands one or two guns and put ammo in their pants pocket, but there are many things you can do otherwise.

First of all, its often helpful for pistols to make belt holsters for them, or buy some that fit your guns a military surplus shops. This helps you carry more guns without impeding mobility. For a larger gun, make a back strap, called a sling, and swing it over your shoulder. Similarly you might want to make a bag that hangs from your belt to carry all your darts. Nerf used to make mesh bags which happily carried about thirty rounds with a belt clip, so if you can dig up one of those, you’ll make good use of them.

This is what you want to do if you’re on a budget, but if you want to spend a bit more, you can always go military. Surplus shops these days will sell you a myriad of holsters, pouches, and accessories which can be easily adapted to Nerf. The sexiest accessory you can get is the Tactical Assault Vest (TAV) which makes use of straps, called M.O.L.L.I.E, which can be used to mount everything from holsters to pouches. They often come with integrated belt loops, so you can attach a gun belt directly to it. One can completely customize where everything goes on the vest so that you can tell by feel where everything is, and have everything easily accessible. The one disadvantage to this type of gear is that it can get a bit heavy, but it is designed to distribute the weight so it doesn’t impede motion.

I personally use a system which is custom made of denim, and is designed to mimic the military system. Its much lighter and has integrated ammo pouches, which holds more ammo than most comparable pouches for a TAV. It’s a good system, though it is expensive, and doesn’t hold up nearly as well as the mil-spec stuff.

So there you have it, a simple three step thought process to go through when choosing your guns. There are many more guns out there than what I have listed, so shop around, play around, and fiddle around until you get your arsenal right. And remember, play your game, nobody else’s.

Me:

Weapons:
2 Roseart Nite-Finders
1 CPVC Nite-Finder
1 Two Foot Blowgun
1 Custom Shotgun
1 Fury Fire
2 CPVC Tech Targets
1 Rapid-Fire 20

Primary role:
Sniper

Gear:
Custom denim TAV with integrated ammo pouches
approx. 200 rounds, mix of Taggers, Sonics, and Micros

From the Armory: Nerf Vortex Nitron

ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL RIIIIII, ZOH MY GOD THAT THING IS HUGE!!!!!

That’s what I thought when I saw a mate of mine roll into Nerf with one ot those things in his arms. This is the biggest Nerf Vortex gun, one of the most intimidating things Nerf ever made. The Nitron. This is the Vortex answer to the darling of young Nerfers, the Stampede.

Now if you follow European car culture, you may be familiar with the new rivalry between McLaren with the MP4-12C and Ferrari with the 458 Italia. Mclaren claims, and seems to be right, that in almost every measurable way, the MC4-12C (really Mclaren? Will you just give the thing a NAME already!) It is superior to the 458. It would seem to be the same when you compare the Nitron with the Stampede. At least initially.

For a start, the stock Stampede makes use of an 18 round clip magazine, while the Nitron makes use of a 20 round clip magazine. The Nitron also follows the Vortex tradition of heavy construction and garish green paint. It also trounces the Stampede at range as well. The Nitron will launch the disks out to 40 ft. and beyond, while the Stampede is limited by a health and safety air restrictor to around 20-30 ft., on a good shot. So its sounding good right? Its better built than a Stampede, it shoots further than a Stampede, and has a larger magazine than the Stampede. So what’s there not to love.

Well, this is where I seem to branch off from the Nerfer community as a whole, because of the Nitron’s powerplant. Like the Barricade and Mech Tommies, it’s another flywheel gun. I have always had issues with flywheel guns because they eat batteries like Doritos and are about as loud as a rocket ship. I honestly feel like there are better ways to achieve fully automatic fire. Now if you are a Top Gear head, you might think I sound like one Jeremy Clarkson the first time he drove a car with a “flappy paddle gearbox,” he thought it was rubbish. That’s how I feel about flywheel systems.

“But aha!” I hear you cry, “Clarkson warmed up to those systems, particularly when Volkswagen released its double-clutch DSG gearbox, so we just have to wait for the technology to mature.” And I’ll go along with that. The modern systems that Nerf and Airzone are using are much more efficient, with greater launching power, than the flies in my first flywheel gun, the old Mech Tommy 20, but its still not the system for me. For one thing, I do indoor, urban Nerfing, where we are simulating various scenarios from hostage rescue to zombie apocalypse. So when I’m being chased down by brain hungry zombies, I really couldn’t give a care about how loud my gun is. But when I’m sneaking about with my squad trying a surprise attack on an entrenched position, I don’t need to give our position away when I’m about to engage by a big “Wrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr” sound. And if I keep it off until right when we’re about to attack, and we suddenly come under fire, I can’t lay down suppressive fire for a crucial several seconds, enough time for my entire squad to be mowed down while I’m waiting for my wheels to start turning. And considering that full auto weapons are choice for suppressive fire support, it kind of kills the point, rather than the enemy (rimshot).

Nerf has made an attempt to remedy this problem by adding a second trigger attached to a pressure switch which turns on the motor. Its attached to the rear grip, operated by the middle finger. So basically squeezing the trigger hand will cause the thing to start cycling. This is ergonomically a better system because it makes the motor easy to turn on when you need it quickly, so you don’t have to run the motor all the time which saves batteries and is quieter. But it still hasn’t solved the problem, as it still takes at least a second for the motors to spin up, so it really doesn’t have quick fire capabilities, essential when you need to cover and escape. It’s a minor tactical weakness, but not the gun’s biggest problem.

The problem is the rate of fire. Its not bad, but you would get more by cycling a Raider or Alpha-Trooper manually, or by using a Stampede. It manages, with the freshest of batteries about 120 rounds a minute, which sounds like a lot, but its not compared to a Stampede at 180 rounds a minute, or an old Rapid Fire 20 which will roll with 240 or more rounds a minute.

Now some will say that the immense range makes up for it, and I have been standing 40 or so feet away from one of these things being fired at me flat, and in about five seconds the hall was filled with a hail or disks coming at me, but if you want something accurate, why buy a massive fully automatic twenty round machine gun? A Protron or Praxis would serve the roll much better and are more versatile and mobile. I just don’t see the point of this gun as a stock weapon.

So to sum up, the Nitron is the BIG brother of the Vortex range, a massive rapid fire weapon which has good range and magazine size, but is let down by its rate of fire. Due to the rate of fire issues and its massive size, the Nitron rates 3 our of 5 disks.

From the Armory: Nerf Vortex Praxis

 ALLLLLLLLL RIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!!!

“Okay, now THIS is a gun.” That’s what I thought when I saw this week’s subject, one of Nerf’s latest clip loading weapons. This is the Vortex response to the venerable Fury Fire, one of the greatest weapons Nerf ever produced, but taken to eleven. This is the first clip fed Vortex gun we’ve looked at, and boy does it work.

The Praxis makes use of a ten shot pump action layout. It’s a multishot, with a detachable magazine which holds ten round. It can also be used with the twenty round mag from next week’s subject. Ten shot mags are a good compromise between volume of ammo and size, and in the Vortex it shows. The ten shot clip from the Praxis is about the size of the six round clip that the Clip System (CS) guns use. You definitely get more for your money with this system, and firearms enthusiasts will note some new features as well. Unlike the CS guns, the Praxis’ clip can be inserted while the bolt is closed, and can be ejected while in the same state. This allows one to chamber a round (load a clip and cock the gun) then eject the mag, top it off, giving the gun an actual capacity of eleven rounds. This also allows one to easily top the mag off in combat without compromising that weapon.

Now what about the gun itself? The Praxis keeps to the line’s tradition of green and silver paint style and tough blocky construction. This particular one is designed to be wielded one or two handed with the addition of a detachable stock, essentially a repaint of the classic Recon stock. A weapon with a front mounted pump to cock lends itself well for two handed operation, and with or without the stock the weapon just feels good. You get a great degree of stability with your hand at the front to support the barrel, and it allows easier cycling than a read slide operated weapon.

I can’ think of no real disadvangate with the gun itself. Its like a classic sports car, front engined, rear wheel drive, perfectly balanced. It just feels good. However, the gun is once again let down by the ammo. The discs have the same yaw problems that they have out of our other two subjects, but in this case its less intrusive. This one features a long barrel (lauch tube might be a better descriptor) which seems to help stabalize the disc in flight. My standard test for range and accuracy of a weapon is shooting at a a regulation sillouet target, which is mounted on my front door, from my bedroom, shooting through my hallway, dinning room, and sitting room. Its a distance of 43 ft., at a slight angle.

From the Armory: Coming Attractions

AAAAAAAALLLL RIGHT!!

Kernel Sanders here with a quick update on the next few weeks of from the Armory. Now as a hard core Nerfer and Modder I tend to throw around terminology that can sometimes be vague, unspecific, or just confusing, so to clear all that up I’ll be providing a glossary of Nerf related terms as a reference as we launch into the next series of articles.

These will entail new posts on arsenal building, identifying what your fighting style is along with general suggestions of what weapons tend to work best for that style. I will then write articles outlining what I believe is the single best weapon for each style, then follow up with a list of guns to avoid.

Slotted in there somewhere will be a quick look at the blasters that either have recently jumped or are about to jump the pond. There are quite a few these days so get excited.

Normal service will resume after that.

So if you ever wanted to start Nerfing and you had no idea where to begin, this series can help.

That’s all I have for you right now, this is Kernel Sanders, signing off.

P.S. This announcement is not a replacement for this week’s review of the Praxis. Real life has stepped in to make my day difficult so I haven’t gotten it quite finished yet, but rest assured it is coming.

Red Shirt Podcast #7: THANKSGIVING NERF!

Hey Internet! Happy Thanksgiving! To celebrate, why don’t you listen to the Skiffy Family Podcast about Nerf? Enjoy!

Nerf Wars Rundown: Episode 4, Happyville

Hello, all! Sorry for missing last week, Calculus and Physics decided to team up and monopolize all of my time. To make up for the lack of Nerf last week, I have a ton of stuff to tell you guys this week.

To start off, I’m going to tell you guys all about a unique (for lack of a better word) game called Happyville. Happyville is easily the most paranoid, terror-inducing game in all of Nerf Wars. This game is based in a town called Happyville that is full of Happy people. However, in this town, there are also several Psychopaths, who are trying to kill all of the Happy people. The Happy people in turn have set out to eradicate all of the Psychopaths. Here’s where it starts getting complicated.

In this game, the number of Psychopaths is completely random. Before the game starts, all players line up and slowly parade past a small alcove, in which stands Mack, the Master at Arms. Much like how the Necromancer is chosen in Necro, Mack selects as many players as he likes to be Psychos. The only limitation he has is that there must be at least one Psycho and at least one Happy person.

Once the Psychos have been chosen, the game begins instantly. Once the game has started, the only certainty you have is what you are. Anyone around you could be Happy or Psycho, and everyone’s allowed to lie. It’s pretty much you against everyone else. In this game, if a Psycho shoots a Happy person, the Happy person is dead, and vice versa. If a Psychopath shoots another Psycho, the two Psychos are allowed to decide whether they are both alive, both dead, or if only one of them remains alive. The creepiest part comes if a Happy person shoots another Happy person. In this case, the Happy person that got shot is dead, and the Happy person that fired goes mad with grief, freezes where they are and sings,

“Hello my baby, Hello my honey, Hello my ragtime gal

Send me a kiss by wire

Baby, my heart’s on fire

If you refuse me, honey, you lose me; then I’ll be left alone

So baby telephone, and tell me I’m your own.”

Every single Happy person around them must immediately freeze and join in singing. After the song is over, the Happy person at fault goes totally batshit crazy for a solid 10 seconds, becoming invincible and shooting everyone in sight, before dying and going to the dead room. One key aspect of this scenario is that Psychos are NOT obligated to sing along. If they feel like keeping their cover, they can sing, but if not, they are the only players who are allowed to move while the song is being sung. This is the only scenario in which you can be 100% certain that a player is a Psychopath. The game is over either when all the Psychos or Happy people have been killed or after 15 minutes have elapsed. If time runs out, the Happy people win as long as there is still at least one Happy person alive.

In short, Happyville is the ultimate game of paranoia, where anyone around you could just be waiting to kill you. Trust no one and if you hear singing, be very afraid.

Happyville is a game that doesn’t get played very often at Nerf Wars. The reason we played it this week was that this week, Mack asked for game nominations much more often than he usually does. This is because this weekend was the last Nerf Wars of the semester. After this weekend, we have off for Thanksgiving, and then our college starts finals. Skiffy isn’t allowed to host Nerf Wars during finals, because all the buildings are guaranteed to be riddled with students who are all cramming for exams and wouldn’t exactly appreciate shouting and shots firing around their heads. But never fear, loyal readers! Nerf Wars start right back up after Winter Break and the Nerf Wars Roundup will follow suit. (Until then, y’all will get to see what other interesting stuff I can babble at you about.)

This week, Chase (MaristPlayBoy), Jason (Junior Varsity), Thomas (Huge 8itch), and I tagged along with Mack (Kernal Sanders) and Watson (Doc Watson) for an extra aspect of Nerf Wars that we had yet to experience. Just about every week at 2am, after the last Nerf game, a few Skiffites will decide that what they need after a long night of running around shooting each other is a heaping helping of pancakes. To fulfill this need, these Skiffites hop into their cars and drive to the local IHOP (which is gloriously open until 6am). Now, you have a group of 4-10 exhausted, loopy Skiffites chatting and eating pancakes and mozzarella sticks at 3 o’clock in the morning. Realistically, what could be more entertaining?

Over the past couple weeks, the Redshirt crew and a few other Redshirts have been taken under the wing of Skiffy’s Master at Arms, Mack Attack. Every Saturday for two to four hours, we convene on the Math building and run through trial after trial, honing our skills so we can become deadly Nerf machines. This group of Redshirts consists of Chase, Jason, Thomas, Kyle, and me from The Crew, as well as a fellow Redshirt, Eric. Our training regimen involves a number of different tests, including target practice, strategic advances and retreats, and a little trial that Chase likes to refer to as “The Gauntlet”. The gauntlet is a test that involves three runs of increasing difficulty. The Redshirt being tested starts at the end of a long hallway, armed with their usual weapons. Standing spread out down the hall are three opponents. The goal is to hit all three targets in the shortest time using the least amount of shots. In the first run, the Redshirt has to sprint down the hall and shoot the completely immobile enemies, working solely on speed and aim. In the second run, the targets can now shoot at the Redshirt, but are rooted to their spots. Now, the Redshirt has to concentrate on speed, accuracy, AND dodging. In the third and final run, all three targets can not only shoot at the Redshirt, but are completely mobile.

And Nerf training isn’t the only thing we’ve been doing. Not only have we been training to be better fighters, but we’ve been learning about building gun holsters and modding Nerf guns. So yeah, it’s a done deal. The Redshirts will be taking over.

Also, I’ve been ordered by the King of the Redshirts to tell y’all about our upcoming Nerf podcast. (Just kidding, Chase!) But seriously, this podcast is epic. For this cast, The Crew brought in several Nerf Veterans, including Mack Attack, Watson, Cyrus, Melissa, Theo, Bockelmann, and Will. We discussed all sorts of games, Nerf weapons that are both game legal and not, amazing feats, and hilarious stories. Chase is going to post it on Thursday and all of you should check it out. If you like the Nerf Wars Rundown, you’re going to love this podcast.

And that just about wraps up my last Roundup for the semester! Roundups will start up again in January. Until then, prepare yourselves for some other interesting stuff that I’ll be posting. (Think Pokemon-Biology and My Little Pony.) I’ll see you here, same bat-time, same bat-channel.

From the Armory: Nerf Vortex Vigilon

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALL RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!!!!

Last time we talked about the Proton and the single shot guns, now its time to move into the multi-shot realm and the Nerf Vortex Vigilon. Now when we say Multi-Shot we refer to guns that can fire multiple shots without have to reload. This is not to be confused with automatic weapons. Automatic weapons can fire multiple shots without having to reload or re-prime (cock), while multi-shots generally refer to weapons which must be primed (cocked) before each shot. The venerable Maverick is one such weapon, a six round revolver known for its awesome styling, natural feel, and horrendous reliability.

Yee olde Vigilon is essentially the Vortex version of the Maverick, using an integrated magazine which holds six rounds. Now the reliability issues which plagued the Maverick is due to a weak spring in the ratchet which turns the barrels (called a turret). The Vigilon dodges the problem by having the rounds stacked in a chamber inside the gun, called an integrated magazine. You access the magazine by flicking a switch located near your thumb, like last weeks gun, and then slotting a stack of six in by hand. This makes reloading very straight forward, and allows one to top off ammo easily.

Like the Maverick, the Vigiolon primed by a slider located on the top read side of the weapon. The action is light allowing one to prime it quickly. Also, since there is no turret to deal with (I’ll explain this in more detail in a later review) the trigger pull is light and can be pulled quickly, so rate of fire is good for a weapon of this type, and in an unmodded head to head challenge, can outperform the Maverick.

Range and Accuracy? Well, once again we’re dealing with the new vortex disks, using a similar propulsion system from the Proton, meaning it gives good range out of the box, and can be modded for better. You’re looking at 40-50 ft. out of box flat. Accuracy is limited by the ammunition itself, and is rather good at close to mid range, but can slew to one side at longer ranges.

The weapon is a bit taller than than a Maverick, but similar in length. With most of the weight concentrated towards the front, it feels very natural to aim, and doesn’t feel bulky or unwieldy. It follows the standard Vortex styling of green and white paint job, with Sci-Fi details molded into the outer shell. It still maintains the N-Strike tactical rail on the upper part of the weapon, giving a solid sighting surface and a dock for all standard Nerf rail attachments. It also continues the Vortext trend of quality, as the feel of the plastics is heavier and more well built than the N-Strike line.

Short and sweet his week, but its short and sweet kind of gun. A good allrounder with good range and accuracy figures to complement a good rate of fire and magazine capacity. An allrounder means a gun that works well in most any situation, and this gun epitomizes it. It has the range to work in longer engagements, while being small enough to maneuver in tight spaces, and a rate of fire to deal with running fights. Its a just works kind of gun, and comes highly recommended to any first time Nerfer. Overall, the Vigilon rates 4 out of 5 disks, for good feel and ranges, but lower accuracy.

Nerf Wars Rundown: Episode 3, Dawn of the Dead

Welcome Skiffites, Nerf Nerds, and all of Geekdom! Once again, it’s time for your weekly dose of vicarious adrenaline and hilarity. That’s right, it’s time for another Nerf Wars Rundown! In this episode, I’m here to tell you guys about a fun little Dart Gun classic known as Dawn of the Dead.

In case you couldn’t tell from the title, this game revolves around zombies. Brain-craving, Nerf—gun-wielding ZOMBIES. In this game, two players volunteer to become zombies, while the rest of the players start off as humans. Once the zombies have been chosen, they have one minute to spread out throughout the building while the human resistance remains on the first floor. After the one minute set-up time has elapsed, it’s game on as the zombies try relentlessly to turn the living into the undead and the humans try desperately to stay alive. Now, those of you who’ve been following my weekly game explanations may think that this just sounds like a simplified version of Necromancer, but there’s a twist.

The zombies don’t die.

EVER.

In Dawn of the Dead, when a player gets shot, they are to sit down on the ground and count to 45 seconds. After those 45 seconds, that player, whether they started as a human or a zombie, has been transformed into one of the human-nomming undead. The downed player can take one shot from prone, but then must immediately stand up and go active. This aspect of the game adds just a touch of terror to the game. Imagine this: you and a small group of survivors are fending off a group of zombies in a staircase. You finally manage to shoot them all down, knowing that you have a few precious seconds to escape, but when you turn around, you see that one of your own has been shot and is sitting in the doorway. Congratulations! You now have about 30 seconds to sprint past them to find some semblance of safety in a zombie-filled building. This feature makes Dawn of the Dead a game of delaying tactics. Since it is impossible to recoup losses, in territory or in team-mates, the game becomes a desperate quest to survive for the whole 10 minutes against increasingly unfavorable odds.

This week at Nerf Wars, we allotted a large chunk of time to playtesting a few new games that Mack Attack has in the works. One game, Capturepoint, is still very much in the works, as it has now been temporarily dubbed “Clusterfuck”. In short, there’s a team of defenders and a team of assaulters. The defenders have to prevent the assaulters from slowly advancing through the building along a set course, hall by hall and floor by floor, taking over a series of checkpoints as they go. During this game, the defending team managed to effectively trap the assaulters in a staircase, preventing them from advancing any further. On each side of the entrance to the stairwell, we had set up groups of snipers to shoot down anyone who attempted to exit the stairs. On one side were three Nerfers – Follett (a vet), Nick (a fellow redshirt), and our very own Chase – who each had blowguns as their primary weapon. After several minutes of clusterfuckery, Follett decided that it would be an opportune time to form a blowgun firing line. From that point on, whenever an assaulter attempted to escape the stairwell, Follett shouted a series of commands:

“Present arms! …Aim! …Fire!”

This continued until the game was ended and sent back to the command room for rehashing. The second game we tested that night was Transylvania. This game is essentially a mash-up of two well-known Skiffy games, Necromancer and Monster Mash (which I will cover in detail at a later date). In this game, everyone starts off as a human and lines up in the lobby. One by one, the players then walk past a small alcove in which stands our Master at Arms. As each player parades past the alcove, Mack will randomly pick four players to be the secret Vampire, Werewolf, Necromancer, and Corpse Burner. In this game, if a player is shot, no matter what team they are on, they sit down on the floor. They must remain on the floor until one of the secrets comes by and tags them, putting them on that secret’s team. If a player is shot again, they effectively reset when they sit down, and can be raised into any of the remaining teams. The task at hand for the secrets is to shoot and raise as many players as possible into their respective teams (vampires, werewolves, zombies, and in the case of the Corpse Burner, just sending people to the Dead Room). Once the game has begun, these players go active and complete havoc is unleashed. The game ends when every player is on the same team.

It was during this game of complete and utter confusion that one of the Dart Gun veterans, Greg, made yet another hilarious impression on the redshirts. (You remember Greg, don’t you? I talked about him in my first Nerf Wars Article: Episode 1, Necromancer) It was towards the end of the game, and several other players and I were down on the first floor, but there were a couple people left standing. Thomas (Huge 8itch) was guarding the main staircase, waiting for any opponent to appear, when suddenly, we heard sprinting footsteps and a voice echoing down the hall. “HANDS UP!! WHO WANTS TO DIE?!” Running in came Greg, shooting wildly at the players that were still standing. After sharpshooting Thomas and the others, Greg ran straight through the lobby and disappeared into the catacombs. Within ten seconds, he was gone.

Welp, that’s it for this week’s Nerf Wars Rundown. Be sure to tune in next week, where I’ll be talking about yet another exciting game and more of our crazy-awesome shenanigans. Until next time!