TV Seasons are Ending!

Hey everyone! So, as the month of May continues on, many TV seasons are approaching their end. There were a TON of new shows this year, many of which I decided to tune into. However, I didn’t stick with all of them. Sometimes it’s hard to keep up! (Especially with the Kardashians. Ha, get it? And no I do NOT watch that show!) In any case, even if I continue to watch some of these new shows, there are some that stand out more to me than others.

The biggest success of this year, in my opinion, would have to be Fox’s New Girl, starring Zooey Deschanel. I only caught on to New Girl towards the middle of the season, but from the first episode I saw, I was hooked. I know the show can be criticized sometimes because Zooey really takes the quirky to a new extreme, but I think that’s kind of the point. I think she embraces it and just tries to have fun with that silly mentality. And you know what? It works. I’m laughing at every episode I watch, and it’s not only because I think Zooey is “adorkable.”

The three guys she shares an apartment with are just as funny, if at times funnier, than she is. Jake Johnson (as Nick), LaMorne Morris (as Winston), and Max Greenfield (as Schmidt) round out the cast perfectly. Johnson and Deschanel have a nice chemistry going, and it drives me insane how pathetic he is, but that just means he’s going a good job as an actor. Greenfield is a total smart-aleck as the douche-y Schmidt; every time he does something stupid, he has to put money in the “douche jar.” All things considered, it’s Morris who stands out the most among the guys. His storylines aren’t really as developed as much as the other two guys’, but even without them, Morris manages to hold his own and gets the best jokes. The dynamic between the three of them works so well, and Deschanel awkwardly fits in (in a good way!) as the odd one out in the household.

It’s really refreshing to see a comedy with such a simple concept do so well, especially with no laugh track to speak of. I bet it stays on the air for a long time — it seems very promising. If you’re curious, Hulu has some episodes available, so I’d recommend taking a peek if you haven’t already.

Another show that left an impact on me was NBC’s Smash. Being the Broadway and theatre nerd that I am, this show is totally captivating for me. With people like Angelica Huston, Christian Borle, and Debra Messing in the cast, you can really do no wrong. I get that not a lot of people may be into the whole song and dance vibe of the show, but it’s really just like Glee, with more serious and mature plotlines. However, I do suggest this show with reservation; if you’re not very into showtunes, it may not be your kind of show. If you are interested, I would say watch a clip from the show on Hulu first to get a better idea of what it is like. 

I could talk about this show at length, but I’ll just give you the basics. It’s about how a show gets produced and how a production team gets the final product to Broadway. It centers on a new musical about Marilyn Monroe and intertwines the actors’/producer’s/director’s/etc. personal lives with the story of the musical. Every episode features songs: some old, some new, and some originals written my Marc Shaiman and Scott Wittman (the writers of Hairspray). However, I don’t think it’s been doing so well in the ratings. It did get picked up for a second season but who knows if that’ll go like the first season did. I’d like it to stick around because there’s not much like it on TV and it’s just super fun.

So those are my two picks for best new tv shows of the season! Of course I didn’t watch every new show, but those stood out the most among the others I did watch. Happy Monday y’all!

GameRx: Colonization

With the new Gods & Kings expansion being released for Civilization V, it seems like as good of a time as ever to look back at the history of Sid Meier’s most popular franchise. Looking back at the older iterations of the game can give us a new-found appreciation for just how much this series has changed over time and the massive impact it’s had on the desktop gaming community. Today, we’ll be looking at Colonization, a Civ-like game where you discover the New World, establish colonies, and revolt against your mother country.

This game comes in three basic flavors: ‘94, ‘03, and ‘08. More of you may be familiar with this title in its most recent form, released as a part of Civ IV in their new 3D game engine. The original came out in 1994, way back during the beginning of NAFTA and the end of Commodore International, and an open source clone of the game was initiated in 2003, piquing enough general interest to justify the Civ IV version of the game in 2008. The original 1994 version is really only viable if your current rig has DOSbox installed or if you happen to have an old beast of a computer gathering dust in the attic, like an Amiga or Commodore. If you have a copy of Civ IV, you should have your hands on the most recent version pretty easily. If you have neither DOS nor Civ IV, go ahead and download FreeCol before you spend money on it and see if you like what you find. Your mileage may vary on any of the three.

FreeCol: Looks familiar, don’t it?

The game’s setup is pretty straightforward, following the basic Civ-like “virtual boardgame” formula. The map is made of squares, and stacks are allowed to move in any of the eight adjoining tiles. The players participate as European powers (the English, the French, the Spanish, and the Dutch) and start with a ship and some colonists in the Atlantic ocean. The indigenous population act as something between sovereign powers and barbarians, being uncontrolled by the human player yet having the ability to trade and make peace or war. The colonists eventually land on the coast as you find a place to establish a colony — or in Civ terms, a basic city. These colonies gather resources and behave much like Civ cities; however, there are some very key differences.

The key difference that separates Colonization from the rest of its sister franchise is its dynamic colonial population. Each unit that you own acts as one unit of population as well and can be moved into or out of any colony as you see fit. Each colonist can also hold a profession out of a fairly comprehensive list, including lumberjacks, carpenters, blacksmiths, fishermen, farmers, distillers, silver miners, preachers, and statesmen.

The town overlay from ’94. Very similar to the later Civ II.

And what would any game about European colonialism be without trade of raw materials and manufactured goods? The colonies can collect different raw materials that can be sold directly to Europe, which is a solid strategy in the early game. However, as time goes on, your colonists can specialize to create manufactured goods, a considerably more profitable investment. Sugar can be made into rum, fur can be made into coats, tobacco can be made into cigars, and cotton can be made into cloth. Of course, this also keeps you bound to your sovereign country. If you don’t bend to the will of your lord’s taxes, they will boycott your most profitable goods. This really does an effective job of showing how reliant the colonists were on the goods of Europe, being unable to break away until they had their own self-sustaining economy that can provide any and all goods required.

As you play, you collect a group of founding fathers who offer to join your cause, each of whom bring particular bonuses to your colony. The bonuses give a really nice representation of how each individual influenced the colonial world. For example, Thomas Paine increases liberty sentiment at a rate proportional to tension with Europe, Pocahontas reduces all native tensions to zero and reduces the rate they increase, and Hernán Cortés provides bonuses to plundering native settlements. This lets you create a sort of roster of leaders that best fit your colony’s needs.

Seriously. Leaving this out was a bad move.

Now, some of you may have noticed that these mechanics do make some noticeable oversight regarding labor. Sid Meier wanted to include slavery in the original release of the game in order to provide a more complete and more historically faithful simulation. Slaves could be used to power your colony’s economy and as both workers and barterable goods, completing the famous “Triangle Trade” we all learned about in fourth grade history class. Slaves could also become freemen, who could then in turn learn new professions to work in the colony. There could also be slave riots, and slaves could be armed as part of a militia with this assumed risk. This would have been a fantastic opportunity to provide an interactive means to understand the dynamics of slavery, the slave trade, and the plantation system in colonial America, but Microprose refused to publish the game with its inclusion for fear of insulting African-Americans. Sid Meier was unhappy with the decision, but followed the guidelines set by the publisher. I can see why it was left out, but I feel it would have really deepened the experience and increased the educational value of the game. If anyone reading this has thoughts on the issue, I’d enjoy hearing them!

Even with this shortcoming, Colonization is an original, unique game that has never quite been matched. As usual, Sid Meier is able to deliver a game that combines strategy with story to create powerful simulations of the history and future of civilization. Give this game a try — it’s a slow start with a bit of a learning curve, but the time going into learning the system is more than worth it. If you want any help figuring out how to play, I’ll happily answer any questions you may have! Just comment or tweet me with your questions and I’ll take you through step-by-step.

Doc Watson is an editor for The RedShirt Crew and the founder of the GameRx Clinic. One of the top items on his bucket list is to meet Sid Meier and have him sign his manual for Civilization II: Gold Edition. Got any questions or comments? Comment below or send him a tweet @DocWatsonMD

Survey of Magical Worlds part 2

Jim Butcher’s Dresden files is probably one of the more popular series featuring a heavily magical world. At 13 books and counting, it’s also most likely not going anywhere any time soon. So, for part 2 of my ongoing series giving an in depth look at some of the more well known magical worlds in modern culture, I’m going to take a closer look at this pretty amazing series.

First off, if you didn’t catch my other two posts, here are some handy dandy links: 

Part 1

My intro post on magic in general

The Dresden Files tell the stories of the various shenanigans and such of Harry Dresden, a wizard in modern day Chicago, who’s probably the only wizard you can look up in the phone book. You could probably best describe him as a wizard P.I. He uses magic to help people solve different cases (though there are certain types of magic he won’t do). He also works heavily with the Chicago Police department’s Special Investigations unit, that deals with crimes that most likely have some sort of supernatural component to them. He also has to deal with the various other magical creatures and beings that exist in this universe too, such as the White Council of Wizards (of which he is a member), various kinds of vampires, faeries, and all kinds of other creatures. 

I personally think this series is pretty awesome, in fact, you can read my review of it on my other blog, Rhyme and Reason, by clicking this link.

But, shameless plug for my book review blog aside (seriously, check it out. It’s pretty awesome), it’s time to get into the discussion of magics. I’m just going to go ahead and say this now: there is absolutely no way I can comprehensively discuss magic in this universe without spoilers. So I’m warning you now: there will be most likely be spoilers. I’ll give you a warning just before a major spoiler, but, consider this your blanket warning–there will be some minor spoilers here and now. 

1. The role/function of magic in the world:

Magic, to Harry Dresden, in many ways works in a similar way to religion. Since using magic is based off willpower, you have to believe in your magic. You have to believe in magic in and of itself. There are more than a few occasions where Harry uses his belief in magic and his mother’s pentacle necklace as a holy symbol to ward off both Red Court and Black Court vampires. There’s still a slightly scientific aspect, as people who possess magical abilities still have to learn how to use it properly, but, the series leans far more heavily on the religious side of magic (to the point where the way its described is very similar to the way the Wiccans describe their uses of magic, but I’ll get a little more into that later).

Magic is described in the series as the energy produced by life, that can be manipulated by those who have the ability to do so. As a force, it serves, ideally, to protect and defend people. Harry constantly uses his magic to help people. It’s more or less the force that keeps people safe from the things that go bump in the night. (Though it can also be the force that makes things go bump in the night as well, depending on who is using it and how) The White Council uses their magic and their authority to keep the other supernatural creatures in line, (as much as they can), and to keep the mortal world safe. There are harsh consequences for using dark magic, especially when that dark magic is directed against humans.

2. Who can use magic:

Unlike in Buffy, in the Dresden Files, the ability to use magic is mostly genetic. Harry mentions that it’s passed down through a family, most commonly from mother to child, though a magic user in some cases has been able to assist non-magic users perform some sort of spell or ritual. He himself inherited his “magic genes” from his mother. And, like any genetic trait, people with magical abilities differ in how much magical ability they have. Some people, like Harry, have a lot of magical ability. Others have just enough to get them into trouble, and others still have barely enough to make any sort of impact. There are actually different terms for the different levels of magic users. Anyone who uses magic falls under the blanket term of practitioner. Magic users who are fully fledged members of the White Council, who have demonstrated sufficient magical ability, get the full title of wizard. Sorcerers are people who either have a large amount of power, but aren’t strong enough to be granted membership into the White Council, or who just aren’t in the Council for whatever reason. Minor talents, on the opposite end, are those who only have a small amount of magic. (Note, all of these are different than warlocks. The term warlock does not refer to magical ability, but rather someone who uses magic improperly, and who has violated one of the seven laws of magic.)

Magic is also not a strictly human phenomenon. Practically every faerie that shows up in the series has magic at her (or his) disposal, and the higher up faeries in the hierarchy have MUCH more powerful magic than any given wizard on the White Council. Some of the older vampires, such as Mavra of the Black Court, are even shown to be practitioners as well. 

3. How is magic used-mechanics:

As I mentioned earlier, Harry describes magic as heavily tied into willpower. You have to focus your will on accomplishing the task at hand. The use of circles and other symbols can make this process significantly easier, but it is possible to do magic without them. Magical circles can be used for a variety of purposes, such as keeping things out or keeping things in. There are other elements that hold a certain power of their own, which can be used, with magic, to create a link. The two biggest examples in the Dresden Files are blood and true names. Every being (I use being because I’m referring to humans, demons, faeries, and all sorts of creatures) has their own true name, which, when said correctly (including inflection, intonation, pronunciation, the whole spiel) has an absurd amount of power. By invoking something’s true name, you can pretty much get them to do whatever you want. There are different specifics for the different types of magic, but ultimately they all come down to the same thing: focusing your will, and committing to what you are doing.

4. Relationship between magic users and non-users:

There is no clear-cut relationship between magic users and non-users. Some people, like Michael Carpenter, Murphy, and Susan Rodriguez readily accept that Harry is a wizard, and that magic exists. But their acceptance is extended to those like Harry who use magic in wholesome ways. Murphy in particular, after being the victim of some rather nasty dark magic, is very wary of any dark magic. Other people, however, are less inclined to willingly accept that magic is real. They dismiss Harry as a crazy person, or some sort of swindler. Dresden mentions on multiple occasions that mortals just don’t want to believe that magic exists. As with any series, the lines are not cut and dry, and among those who know of the supernatural world’s existence, using magic in and of itself is not nearly as much of an issue as what that magic is used to do. 

5. Types of magic discussed in the world:

Dresden discusses several different types of magic. Some are more acceptable than others (some, you know, violate the Laws of Magic and just aren’t good to do. Seriously. The White Council will execute you. With prejudice. No questions, no opportunity for a real defense. Just Boom. No more head. Or life for that matter, as you know, decapitation is pretty much impossible to recover from.) Each wizard has an affinity for different types of magic. Harry himself is much better at thaumaturgy than he is at, say evocation (though he does put some serious work into his evocation skills throughout the series). And while Harry himself is moderately terrible at veils and psychomancy, Molly Carpenter is incredibly talented with them.

Here are some of the many types of magic discussed in the series (Obviously, there are more types of magic than this, but, these are some of the more commonly mentioned ones.) :

Necromancy: magic concerning the dead, and death. Necromancy is forbidden by the 5th Law of Magic.(Though there’s a loophole that Harry exploits in Dead Beat, in which he points out that necromancy is only forbidden on humans, and not, say, millions of years old dinosaur skeletons named Sue.)

Psychomancy: magic concerned with the mind, most commonly some kinds of mind control. (This area is also rather frowned upon by the White Council. Tampering with another human’s mind is also enough to get the sharp side of Morgan’s giant sword, no matter what the intentions, as Molly finds out in Proven Gulty. Luckily….Harry intervenes. For the time being.)

Thaumaturgy: The use of thaumaturgy creates links between items, which can then be used to track and locate items, or for other purposes, like voodoo dolls. In order for it to work, though, some part of the target, like hair, or blood, must be used. Harry is quite adept at tracking spells, and uses them frequently throughout the books

Evocation: Dresden routinely describes evocation as “quick and dirty magic.” While a focus may or may not be necessary, evocation can be done without some sort of ritual. As such, evocation is more well suited to combat use.

Ectomancy: magic dealing with ghosts. It’s a bad idea to leave an ectomancer alone, in a room full of ghosts. Especially if you don’t want him to use the ghosts to attack you….

Kinetomancy: Magic of energy and movement. A really good example of this would probably be Harry’s ring. It stores up a bit of energy from moving his hand, and then he can unleash that energy into a blast of force. 

Well, that’s another magical world down. Two more left and then there will be the exciting conclusion.

Until next time then,

Angel out!

Fantasy’s Physics and Metaphysics: Valar, Maiar, and Mystic Jewels Pt. 1

One of the hallmarks of High Fantasy is that the author creates a new world within their work.  We all recognize some of the names: Middle Earth, Narnia, Alera, Panem, Oz, Nevernever Land, Earthsea.  Even when the story is set in “The Real World” there is often some sort of parallel world or hidden underworld existing unnoticed right next to the human world.  Some of the earliest fantasy books I ever read had, completely aside from the main story, beautiful, and wonderfully detailed worlds.  I would find myself as captivated by learning new things about the structure of the world as I was about the story itself.  For those of you who are aware of this seemingly hidden aspect of fantasy stories, read on, and you might discover some new ones you didn’t know about before, and for those who’ve never thought about, I hope I can share with you one of my favorite parts of high fantasy.  In this and a few subsequent posts, I will look at the structure of several different fantasy worlds (or universes if applicable) and a few major themes in them. 

For me, I first realized the intricacies of fantasy universes when I read J.R R. Tolkien’s Silmarillion.  The Silmarillion is a collection of stories and writings complied and published posthumously by Tolkien’s son.  The stories chronicle “The First Age of Middle Earth” (where as the Lord of the Rings is set at the end of the third age, and the beginning of the fourth).  As the name suggests, most of these stories center in some way around the Silmarils, three of the most beautiful jewels eve created.  The story, however, starts long before that. 

Spoiler Warning: There will occasionally be minor spoilers for the books discussed here. They will usually be minor, and not plot relevant, however, I make no promises.  You have been warned……

The Silmarillion is divided into five parts: “Ainulindalë” (The Music of the Ainur), “Valaquenta” (The Tale of the Valar), “Quenta Silmarillion” (The Tale of the Silmarils), “Akallabêth” (The Downfall), and “Of the Rings of Power and the Third Age.”  Each of these sections is a related collection of stories that begin at the creation of Middle Earth, and end at the creation of the fabled One Ring, the central MacGuffin in The Lord of the Rings.  These parts are roughly in chronological order, and that’s how I will address them.  Like anything else, it all starts with the creation of the world.  In the beginning there was the Void, and outside of the Void there was Eru Ilúvatar, The One, The Father of All.  Essentially, this is a parallel of the Judeo-Christian Creation story.  From his thoughts and mind Eru created the Ainur.  The Ainur are celestial beings that exist with Eru in The Timeless Halls.  Each Ainur knows only that part of the mind of Ilúvatar from which it was created, but there was one, called Melkor, who had some of the gifts of the others.  Melkior was the greatest of the Ainur.  Those of you who know the book of Genesis in both the Jewish Torah, and the Christian Bible will recognize this set up.  If you’re about to say that Melkor is an analogy of Lucifer, then in the words of the Grandfather for Princess Bride: Yes, you’re very smart.  Shut up.   This is where things get a little bit interesting.  Eru gathered all of the Ainur together, and taught them the art of music, and together they sang The First Great Music.  The music begins as Ilùvitar introduces a first theme, and teaches it to the Ainur, but as this theme progressed Melkor grew prideful.  He tried to twist the theme, and corrupted it.  Some of the Ainur began to follow Melkor instead of the original theme and discord clashed within the music.  Then Ilùvatar raised his left hand a new soft sweet theme began, a theme unlike the others, and for a time this restored the balance of the music, but Melkor’s disharmony grew louder to match this new theme.  Then Ilùvatar stood and raised his right hand, and third theme, soft, subtle, and completely unlike the others began to take shape.  Melkor and his followers tried to drown out this new theme with pure volume, but they were unable to.  Finally in one immense powerful chord the music came to an end.  Ilùvatar then reveals to the Ainur that the music they made had purpose.  He tells them that their songs shaped the entire history of the world Eru Ilùvatar was about to create.  Then the Ainur saw a vision of the whole history of Arda, the world.  Then Ilùvatar created Middle Earth, and gave the Ainur the chance to go out into it and shape it themselves.  Not all of the Ainur chose to go, and those that did became known as the Valar.  Among the these was Melkor.  This is more or less the end of the Ainulindalë. 

The Valaquenta begins as the Valar start to shape Middle Earth.  As they do so, Melkor works against them.  If one Valar created lakes and rivers Melkor would boil or freeze them.  If they raised mountains, he would flatten them.   Despite this Middle Earth took shape. The Valar created two great lamps to light the world but Melkor destroyed them.  After this act Melkor fled from the rest of the Valar.  The Valar created the Land of Valinor, far across the sea to west separate from the rest of Middle Earth.  There they created the Two Trees, Telperion and Laurelin.  These two trees would glow with silver and golden light respectively, and they lit the land of Valinor, but the rest of Middle Earth was lit only by the stars.  If you will note, all of this parallels the progress of the first theme of the music, and as this conflict came to a head, the second theme entered into Arda.  The Elder Children of Ilùvatar, the elves, awoke beneath the stars.  Melkor found the elves first, and twisted them into orcs.  During this time Melkor also gathered many Maiar (spirits like the Valar, but less powerful) and other servants to him.  Among these Maiar are creatures like the Balrogs (yes plural).  These fire demons served as Melkor’s personal bodyguards.  Melkor’s Chief Lieutenant was a Maiar name Sauron (yes, yes you’re very smart. Shut Up.).  When the Valar learned what Melkor had done they went to war against him, destroyed his fortresses, and killed many (although not all of his servants).  The War of the Powers ended with the destruction of both of Melkor’s fortresses in Middle Earth, and the capture and imprisonment of Melkor.  They invited the elves with them back to Valior, and those that came with them became known as the high or light elves, and those that remained were known as dark elves.  In this case light and dark referred to whether or not they had seen the light of the two trees.  With Melkor’s imprisonment, and Middle Earth knew peace, at least for a time, although the enemies Chief Lieutenant Sauron remained in Middle Earth.  It was during this time that the elven craftsman Fëanor created the three Silmarils.  Within these three jewels of unmatched beauty, the great craftsman managed to capture the light of the two trees.   

So in summary, Eru Ilùvatar created the Ainur.  A great music was made that planned out the entire history of Arda, the world.  Eru then created the world, and sent some of the Ainur into Arda to shape it.  These became the Valar.  Melkor, one of the greatest of the Valar, opposed their work.  Shortly after the elves first awoke in Middle Earth, a great war was waged between the Valar and Melkor and his minions.  In the end Melkor was defeated and imprisoned in Valinor, the land the Valar created for themselves.  Some of the elves also came with the Valar back to Valinor, and in the time there, Fëanor created the three most beautiful jewels ever crafted: The Silmarils. 

And now, alas, this post must end, because my girlfriend (Angel in the Mirror) is insisting that we go out to dinner but fear not!  In my next post I will explain what the jewels are, why they’reimportant, and how all of this is relevant to the Lord of the Rings that we all know and love. 

I need to make a slight disclaimer here.  Much of the material in the Silmarillion is presented in multiple locations, sometimes with conflicting names, dates, and other minor details.  I have drawn from the Silmarillion because it is the source I know the best, but there are other sources and writings out there.  

Where We’ve Been

So you may have noticed that there was only one article last week. Well, sadly, with a student run blog, the last week of finals combined with packing up and heading back home made it impossible for me to do my editing duties, and I didn’t want subpar articles coming out just to be there. I’d like to think we have a standard of quality at this blog, and that quality means a lot to me and the rest of us here. I thank you for putting up with a week without content, and I assure you such an event will not happen from now on.

That said, I have some exciting news. First, I’d like to formally announce that DocWatson and CakeVsDeath have been promoted to editor status. Having some more editors ensures we’ll never be content dry like we were last week, and these two are great for the job.

Second, the Tournament of Champions is not dead! I know it’s been two weeks, but the truth is that I do put a lot of time and research into these articles, and with finals, that’s been an impossibility. Given how out of my depth I am with Lord of the Rings outside of the basics, I’m going to need one more week to ensure I know what I’m talking about. Come Monday, however, the tournament will come back with a vengeance, and next Saturday, a champion will be crowned.

Finally, and most awesomely, in my humble opinion, we’re going to be talking to Chris Pranger and Kyle Martinak once again, and this time, our podcast will be posted on Escapist Magazine and their Media Sandwich iTunes listing. We’ll be doing the interviewing, but we’ll both be posting, so I’m looking forward to the exposure that it will likely bring. What makes this awesome for you however is that they love answering viewer/listener questions. Please ask away in the comments below, and we’ll make sure to ask them what you want to know.

Thanks again for your patience, and we look forward to providing you new content in the future

Chase/MaristPlayBoy

TV Turnover

It seems like just when new shows get going these days they’re cancelled for something else.

Junior Varsity here with the scoop on some of this year’s shows, what’s ending, and what we have to look forward to.

Find out, after the break.

I was inspired to write this post upon hearing that Awake had been cancelled by NBC. In case you’re curious about it, check out my article from last month here: Awake

I am of course, sorely disappointed in NBC’s decision to cancel one of their most intriguing shows to date.

This is the time when networks are deciding the fate of many, so here are some other shows I’ve learned about:

Game of Thrones, the wildly successful adaption of George R.R. Martin’s book series by HBO, has been renewed for both a third AND a fourth season. Impressive. For more info, read my article here: Game of Thrones

Alphas, the Syfy superhero show often compared to Misfits or Heroes, has also been renewed for a second season. This makes me happy as well. For info about Alphas, read here: Alphas

Another Syfy show is also returning, quirky procedural Eureka. While some fans have lost interest, loyal followers are glad for the show’s fifth season, returning this summer.

On the disappointing side of Syfy, the Battlestar Galactica spinoff Blood and Chrome never made it past the pilot. The pilot was filmed, but the network decided it was too expensive and gave it the axe. This is similar to other spinoff Caprica, which made it one season before its demise.

Not surprisingly, NBC musical hit Smash is renewed, although much controversy surrounds what direction the show will go in beyond the season finale. For info on Smash, click here: Smash

(You can tell I watch a lot of TV, cause I keep writing articles about it).

AMC’s popular zombie drama The Walking Dead is set to return for its third season. While some fans have been thus far disappointed, signs indicate that the show is moving in a better direction, and that it will improve next year. Good job, AMC.

HBO’s vampire guilty-pleasure True Blood is sending out promos for it’s fifth season this summer. I rather enjoy the show. Filled with fantasy and sex, (and blood, of course) the show would be more enjoyable is it wasn’t suffering from romantic conflict every five seconds. Seriously, Sookie, calm the fuck down.

Also returning will be several shows with shortened, or half seasons. Most or all of these shows will end after this. These include:

FOX’s Fringe, on it’s fifth and final season. Having quite successfully ended its fourth, it’ll be interesting to see where it goes.

Community, by NBC. Marist PlayBoy knows this show much better than I do, but it certainly is funny. This is kind of a surprising move on NBC’s part. The show is beloved, but the ratings are going down. I’m going to attribute this to what is hurting a lot of shows: scheduling. People want to watch TV when they are free, not when the network demands. So when people don’t watch it live, and record it or wait for Hulu to pick it up, the network takes it as a sign of dislike. NETWORKS: THIS IS A LIE.

That’s my only rant, I promise.

30 Rock, for a full, yet final seventh season. Doc Watson has a lot more to say there I’m sure, as he is up to date on 30 Rock, and I am not. All I can say is that Tina Fey is awesome.

A recent interest of mine is Supernatural. It is currently finishing its seventh season, and no word on whether or not an eighth will come. Time will out, I suppose, but it’s got the quirky sci-fi feel that Joss Whedon (praise the Lord of Quirky Sci-Fi) has mastered.

So, Awake joins the early graveyard shared by Firefly and Jericho. We will mourn you.

This has been fun. If there’s a show you’re interested in that I have not mentioned, but you would like to hear about, leave it in the comments below, and I’ll share as soon as I know something.

Junior Varsity, signing out.

The Zombies Have Infected Youtube

Hey everyone! Junior Varsity here with the scoop on some zombie madness across Youtube.

Find out who’s infected, and how long you have until they reach you, after the break.

So I’ve taken to watching Youtube recently and have stumbled across some interesting little gems that vary in scope and production value. I thought you might appreciate my thoughts on the matter, as footage preparing us for the inevitable zombocalypse is very important business.

The first movie I’d like to tell you about is from a channel named ColinandConnor. Now they have made a live-action movie series based on the popular undead franchise Left 4 Dead. I myself am unfamiliar with the franchise, but I went to three of my expert friends: Andy (Magneto, seen in a few videos waaay back), Craig, and our own Doc Watson.

Feedback was highly imformative. While the spirit of survival was present, the film portrayed several crucial flaws in planning (a zombie banging on a door that opened inward…etc). Also, the actors seemed to be a little less developed than they could be, but hey, they’re kids on a minimal budget. They’ve done an amazing job for getting as much awesome zombie-slaying as they did. Still entertaining, I have included the first part below:

That was fun.

Now I will tell you about the most recent of zombie-training movies I have discovered. I was browsing as usual when I stumbled across a British full-length (well, 47 minutes, but that’s pretty good) zombie saga. All in one video, which is pretty nice.

It’s name…is Zomblies.

The premise is that post-infection, a wall has been built that separates what’s left of civilization and the zombie infested wilderness. After a rookie zombie-killing squad run by a private corporation is ambushed by a new strain of zombie, the crack team of zombie-killers is sent in to extract them.

Of course, with zombies, things never quite go according to plan.

The film itself was stylistically very slick. Nice mood, nice cinematography, and only a few moments of “shaky cam”. However, there are also some drawbacks here.

Being only 47 minutes, the film has no time to develop its characters. This isn’t a top complaint, because character development isn’t really what I’m looking for in a zombie flick. So I’ll let that pass.

But it does also rush the story a bit, including several deaths quite quickly, and it ends with a rather unsatisfying cliffhanger, and no explanation of why the zombies have suddenly mutated into a new strain (that is faster and smarter etc).

Yes, these zombies run, which while adding to the film’s tension, detracts something else. There’s something a bit more terrifying about a slowly shambling horde than a running one. The slow horde only has to wait for you to let your guard down, slip up once, and you’re undead. Psychologically, it’s much more of a strain and a terror than the jump-scare fast zombie oh-my-god-running-zombies-we’re-totally-fucked.

So there’s that.

There was also a scene where the main protagonist had to wade through a hallway full of floor-bound zombies. They were reaching at him with their hands and everything and I found it rather unrealistic. I mean a true zombie marine would know better, one bite on your ankle and you’re finished.

But I suppose he made up for it by being very smart with a motorcycle briefly after that. He made good use of it to aid his escape. I was proud.

So while there are drawbacks, valuable lessons can still be drawn from this film: shoot the infected friends immediately, don’t whine about it for half and hour. Don’t wade through zombies. Duh. And don’t ever volunteer to go into zombie-infested territory. I mean my god, Zombieland Rule number 17: Don’t be a hero.

So here for your enjoyment, I present: Zomblies. Oh and they’re British, so it’s automatically cooler.

This is Junior Varsity, signing out from this zombie report.

My Backlog and Me, Part 3: Wrapping Up

The following is the final part of a three-part series reflecting on some of my ([WittySciFiPun]’s) gaming tastes and habits. 

As I conclude this series, I would first like to bring up a few things that I could never quite fit into my previous articles, but still somehow relate to the subject at hand.

For starters, I must mention that stories in games do not interest me. The quality of games’ stories does not factor into this; I’ll leave the debate over whether or not they can stand up to stories in other media up to someone else. I play games for their gameplay mechanics, their challenge, and their entertainment value. So protagonist X’s struggle against problem Y will never compel me to finish a game, no matter how exceptional the narrative is. If anything, I prefer to make up my own stories as I play games. For all of the story beats in the various quests in Skyrim, the most fun I have when playing that game is when I’m either exploring the overworld or sneaking around in dungeons. This is probably why I am fond of sandbox, open-world games, but no so much RPGs, which in my experience do not always have the best gameplay mechanics. Now, games in this genre usually make up for this weakness by incorporating deep stories, and while I understand how these stories can appeal to other gamers, they just don’t appeal to me.  This does not mean that I can’t appreciate a game’s writing, however; I especially appreciate when a game involves good humor, such as Portal 2 or Saint’s Row the Third.

Secondly, I’d like to expand on something that I briefly mentioned in my first article: my gaming “mood”.  It’s pretty simple, really: sometimes I want to play a particular type of game, and other times I want to play something else. If I have a busy schedule, for example, I’ll probably play something that is easy to pick up and play in short bursts, such as Super Meat Boy or Audiosurf, while if I have an entire day ahead of me with nothing to do, I may play something a bit longer- this is when I usually try to get one step closer to actually finishing one of my unfinished games. Other times, however, I just don’t feel like playing any video games at all, instead choosing to fall back to the internet to fix my boredom. And most of the time I end up just playing Team Fortress 2. I cannot state enough how much I like TF2: not only do I not tire of the game’s core mechanics, but now there are a few particular servers which I regularly play on, so I have a greater sense of community when playing that game as opposed to any other game, multiplayer or otherwise.

Well, now that those are out of the way, I’d like to take a look at the main consequence of my extensive backlog: I probably won’t buy that many video games this year. Not because I’ve decided to finish all my old games first- I don’t particularly care if I finish a video game or not- but because nothing that’s coming out in the near future has really grabbed my attention. (Now, I know that I’m saying this a month before the year’s biggest video game convention, E3, but I doubt that E3 will change much for me, especially since most of the “new” announcements will probably be games to be released in 2013 or beyond.) When I look back on what makes me finish a game, the factor of a game’s novelty stands out. I realize that while I look forward to new franchises, with their own unique ideas that separate them from the crowd, the industry as a whole is going in the opposite direction, with the big hits being sequels to well-established franchises (Assassin’s Creed III, Halo 4, etc.) and many gamers wanting sequels to these franchises and others. Now, I’m not condemning the game industry here, far from it- I am just one person, and I do not expect everyone to cater to my very specific tastes, nor do I care that many people have different tastes in gaming than me. And yes, I know that the desire for sequels within the industry is hardly a new thing, and that it’s been going on for at least a generation of consoles or two, if not more. 

But this year is special for me in that I think I can safely say that having a bunch of unfinished games in my library, due to losing interest in them, has finally burned me out in buying new ones. Because while I did enjoy my time with those games until I lost interest, I want to stop that backlog from growing. It will be a while before I buy a game again without being sure that I will finish it. And since that is not something you can discern from a few trailers and/or a demo, it’ll be a tough sell to convince me that I will actually finish it. Ergo, the amount of game purchases I make in a year will probably decrease considerably from last year to this year. However, I may buy more small, “indie” games this year, due to their usually short lengths, and the fact that they have more room to take risks in game design and mechanics, often resulting in novel and varied ideas. Of course, there are always the games that can’t be “finished”, such as purely multiplayer games or games such as Audiosurf (where the amount of content is determined by one’s own music library; each song is its own “level”). Mostly, it will be the big-budget, “triple-A” games that I will buy less of, due to the fact that most of them will be stuff that I’ve played before in some fashion, and that they tend to be the longest games in terms of the time it takes to complete them.

But lest one thinks that I am getting burned out on video games in general, let me assure you that this is not the case- while I may not be spending as much money on them this year, I will probably spend around the same amount of time on them. I still have plenty of games that I am still interested in playing, and who knows- maybe I’ll get back to some of the games that I didn’t complete long ago.

Party your way through Finals

TGIFF Mix by Laura Via

So if you’re like us, you may be going through or getting ready to go through a gauntlet of academic testing commonly known as college finals.

Yeah. It’s tough. It’s mind-numbing and horrible. BUT there is a chance for some fun.

My sister is an awesome DJ person (also a model – nbd) and she created the mix I have linked above. So if you like to party, put this on and jam around your house. It’s definitely super fun.

Just something to help you relax a bit from the stress. Enjoy!

Prognosis: Planet of the Apes (2001)

This iteration the Planet of the Apes series directed by Tim Burton is an action movie starring Marc Wahlberg on a…well, a planet of apes. It’s pretty standard low-goal, high-budget sci-fi action fair with one of the most bewildering, shoehorned twist endings in the past decade. The film itself is rather underwhelming, failing to meet the assumed criteria set by the previous films and television programs of the franchise other than having a planet with apes on it, passing as a shiny action movie and little else. It really shows — the action is fairly well-paced and the overall, but its merit as a work of sci-fi is severely lacking by using science fiction as a setting rather than a genre. If you want a synopsis, go to the link at the top of the paragraph; I’m here to analyze, not summarize.

It should be noted that this film is not to be confused with Planet of the Apes (1968) or Rise of the Planet of the Apes (2011), both of which are much better science fiction films in almost every dimension.

Now, where to begin on this science-fiction train wreck of a movie?

The main issue I have with this movie is that, while it is a reboot, it completely undermines the point of the first movie of the series in which the overarching motif was the complete role-reversal of apes and humans. The original themes and motifs of the original were pretty heavy stuff, if a bit narmy by today’s standards. Humans become savages without complex language or civilized structure, while apes have language, culture, and guns. It makes an effective commentary on the treatment of animals (especially primates) while also criticizing the manipulation of science by bureaucracy, politicians, and religion in favor of anti-intellectualism.

The new Planet of the Apes looks this concept straight in the eye and slaps it across the face with a damp towel. It’s pretty much just using the name as a marketing tool for a mediocre action flick. Sadly, there’s not much surprise in that; as the genre of science fiction expands and becomes more profitable, many of the more subtle ideas, motifs, and conflicts are cut in both time and budget in favor of large set pieces, high-end CGI, and lengthy action sequences. Executives just seem think the general public is too … well, dumb to grasp a lot of the intangibles of science fiction and fantasy. Some actually considered Inception to be a bit of a gamble on these grounds, which is why we see more movies like Clash of the Titans and Transformers than we do in the vein of District 9 or Brazil.

But I digress.

In this installment of the Planet of the Apes saga, the human subordinates are able to speak perfect English, changing the original juxtaposition that made the original so moving. It sacrifices the strong commentary on animal cruelty, sapience, and anti-intellectualism for a shallow criticism of racism and slavery. Now, this idea is not without merit; heck, I think it could have made a great movie. What’s so frustrating is that it takes no risks in showing any sort of duality in its presentation, thus lacking the ethical punch of the more successful films of the series. As a result, we end up getting a watery “racism is bad, mkay?” message instead of anything more meaningful.

That’s not to say that everything is bad in this film. The apes have a very real feel to them thanks largely to the handiwork of Rick Baker, using massive amounts of makeup and cosmetics to create the face of each character to give each a certain fleshiness that just isn’t obtainable with CGI. Technology, weapons, armor, clothes, and set pieces are well designed and set a good tone for the film, taking heavy inspiration from the likes of John Howe and the Brothers Hildebrandt. Overall, it’s a very pretty movie; there’s definitely no arguing that point.

What’s really holding this film back is lack of purpose, for lack of a better term. To me, this seems to be an endemic problem to many of Burton’s films. In any good example of science fiction, there is always a core hypothesis that drives the story. Part of what made the original so frightening and intense was how the anti-intellectualism of the apes was limiting the society of both humans and apes as a whole. We draw parallels between the hypothesis and modern society and see ourselves reflected in alien scenarios, giving a different appreciable context of human actions to the viewer. We project ourselves and society onto the template and make (sub)conscious inferences from there.

Burton’s story has no real hypothesis of the sort — there’s little conflict outside of the physical danger for the protagonist. Wahlberg’s character is rather dull and has no appreciable personal motivations, making him uninteresting and unrelateable. The newer film’s simplicity keeps you waiting for the second moral conflict or plot twist that never really comes to pass. The film instead plays into Burton’s strengths and focuses on the portrayal of the world the characters are in. However, as so many Star Wars fans are eager to tell you, pleasing aesthetics rarely make up for bad acting or plot.

The thing that really bothered me, though, was that the apes didn’t really have a purpose. If you’re going to make a choice in something as important as character species, the choice you make should have purpose in order to pull the story into a tighter focus. This movie could have almost any sapient species or characters and still carry about the same weight. Let’s say he wanted to use jaguar-people. The story still works and has the added benefit of being a bit more original and interesting. Maybe they could have used lizard-men? or how about centaurs? or perhaps just classic greys? This flaw is largely endemic to the branding attempt, but I feel that another species would have been a lot more interesting to view without detracting anything significant from the experience.

I stand by what I said regarding The Day the Earth Stood Still. If they had stuck a little closer to the original premise of the film, the film would have had a tighter focus and would have held its own more effectively as a sci-fi movie. It’s not really a “more than once” movie, so I wouldn’t go out of my way to buy a copy unless it were in a $5 bargain bin at the local mega-mart. After all, there’s a reason that Burton said he’d “rather jump off a bridge” than make a sequel — that should say a lot in of itself. That said, if you find a cheap copy, know a friend who has it, or see it at the library, give it a look. If you’re just looking to kill some time riffing a movie over a bowl of popcorn with your friends, you can definitely do a lot worse.

Doc Watson is the founder of The GameRx Clinic and editor for The RedShirt Crew blog. He would really like to know how any ape in a starkly anti-intellectual society could identify aspirin by name. If you have any questions, comments, or input, leave a comment below or send him a tweet @DocWatsonMD